The Katie Chronicles: Snuggle Management Edition

We are a very physically affectionate family, with someone constantly hugging, smooching, holding hands...interwoven with lots of tickling, pretend pinches, and feigned gnawing. One of Katie's early sentences was, "No eating me, Mommy!" (accompanied by buckets of giggles) because I used to pretend to eat her feet while I had her on the changing table.  So recently, Katie was sitting with me in a chair watching a little TV. Her dad sat down in another chair and she started to get up and go over to him. She paused because she seemed to believe that I deserved an explanation. She said, "Mommy, I need to go snuggle with Daddy right now. You know how I snuggle with you all the time? Well, Daddy doesn't get as many snuggles as you do so I need to snuggle with him now. I'll snuggle with you later." I asked her to pencil me in for a 7:00 and she agreed. Now, where's Ethan?

The Katie Chronicles, Bits and Pieces Edition Guest Starring Ethan

Ethan has crossed over from Cub Scout to Boy Scout and his den's final outing was Saturday night to a Hawks game. Ethan gave me the game update afterward and summarized it by saying the Hawks beat the Denver Chicken Nuggets, 97-92. Later, Katie was playing pretend and we overheard her telling an imaginary friend that he was "getting on her nerds." (I hate it when people get on my nerds, too.) Later still, Katie wanted to hear a particular song so I found it on YouTube. The song had a bad word in it (thanks, Katy Perry) and I said, "Oh no, a bad word!" and started to turn off the song. Katie said, "Don't worry. I didn't hear it." 

The Katie Chronicles: Girls’ Nights and Hip Hop Hats Edition

Jerome has been a Cub Scout leader for four years now and every time he has a den or a pack meeting, Katie and I have a Mom and Katie Night.  Tonight is Jerome’s last den meeting as a Cub Scout leader. I will enjoy having him home more but I’ll also miss my special nights with Katie.  Tonight’s activities featured Girl Scout cookie delivery to our local Johnnie’s New York Pizza and staying for dinner, of course.  Then there was ice cream and there might have even been some Taylor Swift singing -- “We are never, ever, ever….”   -- in the car on the way home.  During dinner, I discovered that Katie’s green stocking cap is her “hip hop hat.”  When I asked her what hip hop was, she gave me a pretty good answer, along with an example song.  She also told me that it’s called “hip hop” because it makes you shake your hips and hop around.  How can I give this up?  We’ll definitely have to schedule some more Katie and Mom Nights even after the boys are back. Taylor Swift is optional.

The Ethan Update: Boy Tribe Anthropology Edition

Ethan recently turned 11 and he had his birthday party at Sky Zone, which is a place that has every surface covered by trampolines. It's lots of bouncy fun and a trip to the orthopedist waiting to happen for the over-40 crowd. So we arrive and one of the party-goers is already there. He runs up to Ethan and yells, "Hey Ethan, I'm gonna rip your balls off!" No hello, no how ya doing....just an immediate threat to the private parts. Ethan didn't seem alarmed. He just laughed and they ran off together to play. I turned to my husband with furrowed brow and said, "Translation, please. I clearly don't understand the rituals of your people." He just gave me a sly smile and said, "What? Women don't greet each other by threatening to damage each other's ovaries?" No, Jerome. No, we do not. My field research with the boy tribe continues. More reports to follow.

The Katie Chronicles: Serious Issues Edition

One of the things that I really enjoy as a parent is the number of highly serious conversations I have with the kids. It's fun to see how their little minds and hearts work and to help them learn to navigate the world while their problems are still mostly solvable. Katie recently heard a song called Loco Legs about uncontrollable dancing legs (Fresh Beat Band, for you parents of young ones). Katie sat down by me with a slightly furrowed brow and very seriously warned me that it was important not to sit next to someone with trouble controlling their limbs because the flailing might hurt me. With equal gravity, I agreed that was a good idea. She then said she'd put something on her legs to keep them from acting crazy if she got Loco Legs. I said, "Like braces?" She said, "No, not teeth, Mommy. Legs." I showed her a picture of leg braces on my phone and she agreed that would be a good treatment for Loco Legs. Please make a note for the future should you be afflicted.

The Ethan Update: The Boys' Club Edition

Ethan was recently telling me he needed some of my family ancestry information because he has an assignment to come to school dressed as an immigrant ancestor. I reminded him his mom is from Australia, making her an immigrant, but he wanted a male ancestor because he's a boy and he wants an ancestor like him. I jokingly asked him how he knew he was a boy and he said: "Well...I like explosions...and farts...and burping." Hopefully we can raise that bar for male status a tad higher in the coming years. 

The Ethan Update: Science Edition

Every night at dinner we ask the kids what their favorite part of the day was. Tonight, Ethan's answer was science class, where he learned that hydrogen has one electron and one proton. Then:
Me: "Ethan, if Katie were an element, what would her properties be?"
Ethan, after pondering for a millisecond: "She'd be essential to making rainbows and unicorns." (Actually, I think he said "rainbow-pooping unicorns," but an "ahem" from his dad altered his answer).
Jerome: "When she came in contact with boys, she'd have the same properties as unobtainium. Also, she'd have a lot of free radicals."
Me: "She may produce a lot of radicals but they wouldn't be free, 'cause nothing about my girl is cheap. So Ethan, what properties would Ethanium would have?"
Ethan: "I don't know but there'd be a lot of it in Pop Tarts."