The Katie Chronicles: And So It Begins Edition, Guest Starring Ethan

The scene from our house, starting at 5.36 am: "Mommy! Mommy! THE ELVES ARE BACK! Look, look, look! Oh, I'm going to write mine a note to give Santa! But I can't touch her. Mommy, where should I put it? The elves are back! THE ELVES ARE BAAACK! Hello elves! Daddy, can we watch Star Trek? Because I told my elf I'd show him Star Trek.

The Katie Chronicles, Nature Girl Edition

Both kiddos were running around the woods of northeast Georgia this weekend on separate Scouting camping trips.  Jerome and I got some much-needed couple time and the kids got some fresh air and Scouting accomplishments. Katie has returned to the nest and been smothered with "I missed you" hugs and kisses. Now we're in the Guess What phase. "Mommy, guess what? We got to go *horseback* riding!" "Daddy, guess what? I made my own fire like you taught me!" Based on that happy but tired little face, I'm guessing Crash phase is coming soon.

Parenting Math

Parenting involves a surprising amount of math and there are two common parenting math mistakes that people make (including me before I lived this).  The first is the assumption that having two children is twice the work as one.  Logical, yes, but not true. When you have two children you have to manage each individual child, plus the relationship between them.  You have to teach them how to get along or at least refrain from killing each other. "Her hot dog is bigger than MINE!" and "He's looking at me!!" and "Yesterday you gave her two goodnight kisses!!  Why do you love her more?"  And so on. If your kids are extra prone to fighting or you have one with a special need like ADHD or sensory issues, multiply up as appropriate.  So, it's not 1 + 1 = 2 in terms of workload.  It's 1 + 1 = 3.  The other parenting math mistake is that having one child is 1/2 the work as two.  Wrong again. One child is quieter and, when something is mysteriously broken or stained, you have less detective work to do, depending, of course, on the maturity level of your spouse.  But when you have two children, they can play together at least some of the time and the older one can help the younger one, when not administering noogies and purple nurples. Only children, especially before they're too young to go over to neighbor's houses, look to you to amuse them.  Unless you enjoy playing endless rounds of Candy Land or inventing science experiments out of peanut butter and cat litter, it's a lot of work.  You have the most adorable coworker in the world, but it's work nonetheless.  

The Katie Chronicles: Family Values Edition

 I've had a very stressful few weeks and, while I haven't really talked about it with the kids, Katie knows something's up. On Thursday night, she said, "Mommy, why don't you do some yoga? It always makes you feel better.  It makes me feel good, too." I thought about what she said and decided to replace my normal workouts on the bike this week with all yoga. On Sunday night, I told her about this and thanked her for giving me such a good idea. So this morning I got up to do yoga and I soon had three observers, a sleepy-eyed Katie and the two curious cats. I settled in and concentrated on the vigorous yoga practice I'd chosen for several minutes and then I looked up to check on Katie. She had quietly stopped watching me and started writing something on her little white board. She'd written me a note. "Mommy, you are doing a great job! Love, Katie PS, thank you for taking my advice." There may not be any crying in baseball but there was a  tear (and a big hug) in yoga today.

The Katie Chronicles, Persuasion Edition

 Katie: Mommy, I got to go to the treasure box today at school [for good behavior]. 

Me: Great! What did you get?

Katie: Gummies. I knew we were having ice cream later today so I didn't get candy.

Me: Sweetie, gummies are candy.

Katie: They are?!?

Me: Yes, unless they are your vitamin gummies, they're candy.

Katie: But Mommy, I read the label and it said they have 6% protein! So they can't be candy.

Me: Nice try. They're candy.

She totally knows how to get to me, though. Label reading. That's my girl.

The Katie Chronicles: Atlanta Girl Edition

Most kids have cars they like to play with and Katie is no different. She has a pink Barbie two-seater convertible and a Cinderella carriage that see some action around our house. Recently she was zooming them around the coffee table and through a blanket tunnel. They were having a good time until they stopped short and stayed still, sitting side by side. She told me they had to stay there for awhile because they were stuck in traffic. Yep, she's an Atlanta girl.

http://youtu.be/V020XgCqHFo

The Ethan Update: Roughing It Edition

Ladies and gentlemen, we have our first sleep-away camp survivor....Ethan! It was Boy Scout camp and he earned his "Firem'n Chit" and his "Totin' Chip." (The difference between a chit and a chip gets explained later, I hope). These accomplishments mean he's demonstrated he can use both according to strict safety standards. The former means he can carry matches and build fires and the latter means he can now go beyond whittling in one place to carrying a knife or hatchet around camp if he needs it. About an hour after he returned home, you can probably guess what he asked. "Daddy, is there anything I can chop down with a hatchet?" So if any of our trees or bushes disappear in the near future, I should be able to solve the crime. Also, if you need any chopping or burning done, I have your boy.