What I've been up to

Hello! This is technically my second ever blog post, but I still think this is pretty cool. The point of this particular post is to provide an update on what I've been up to for, oh, the past twenty years or so. I'm writing this because I've recently gotten in contact with several people who I knew in high school or college but whom I've lost contact with over the years. Via the wonder of Facebook, we're finding each other again and the inevitable question arises: So...whatcha been doing since high school/college? So here's the (abridged) answer:

OK, so flashback to 1987. I had big hair and drove a Chevy Citation. I graduated gratefully from good ol' WHS and went off to college. The first semester was rough but then...I felt like I'd found heaven. I got involved in some groups at OSU and met some people and had one of best periods of my life. I loved college in general, loved OSU, met awesome people, yadda, yadda. I went as a pre-med student but quickly realized that every specialty I was interested in would have meant that I'd live at the hospital. I was very interested in medicine but also wanted a life. I had always wanted to be a doctor so when that went out the window, my world was totally rocked and I had no idea what else I would do. I had terrible undergraduate academic advising at OSU (my one criticism of the experience) and, thus, no guidance. Besides science, my other favorite subject in school was English and I also really loved psychology and helping people. So, I decided to be a counselor. I wanted the option of working in schools so I wanted to get a degree in school counseling. That required an education degree and so I got my bachelor's in English Ed. Loved being an English major and had some outstanding professors. I graduated with my bachelor's and stayed at OSU and got my master's in counseling.

When I graduated in 1993, we were in the middle of a bad recession. There were no counseling jobs available, or not many anyway. My advisor suggested that I apply for positions on college campuses, as I had worked on campus at OSU for a few years. I applied for an admissions job at OSU-Okmulgee (technical branch of OSU) and got the job. (Pay attention, this whole "falling into things accidentally but fortunately" will be a theme in this story.) I lived in Tulsa -- loved it! -- made or continued some fab friendships -- hey, Art and Cindy! -- and also adopted the noble beast named Misha Meowkova. I thought I'd take the job for a year and then get a counseling job. But life had other plans.

I loved working on a college campus and discovered the field of student affairs. I said, "You mean to tell me that I never have to leave college and I get to work with fun students at one of the best times of their lives and they'll pay me for this??" Wow! I could still help people and not have to deal with the parts of counseling I didn't like (dealing with parents who cause their kids' problems and don't want to hear that, etc.). Eureka!

So I started planning a career in student affairs and I decided I wanted to get a doctorate. People had been asking me about it and I quickly saw that the PhD was the "entry ticket" to most higher level administration jobs in education. I got a job back in Stillwater working for OSU and intended to work there while completing a doctorate. (While there, met a great friend Pamela). My boss there -- Larry Kruse -- was a real mentor who encouraged my educationally masochistic tendencies...I mean my educational goals, but I wanted to see what programs were available outside of OK, since that's where I'd spent almost my entire life. I looked at U of Maryland and U of Georgia since they had good student affairs programs. UGA was third on my list, but they asked for an interview first among the three places I applied to. I went to Athens and ahhhh...fell in love. It was the program I wanted in one of the best college towns ever (yes, they rate these things and, in the case of Athens, GA, they're right). So I packed up the Kitty Cat of World Renown, Misha, and moved to Athens.

While getting my PhD, I wanted a live-in position in a residence hall. Most, or at least many, people in student affairs have a background in student housing and I wanted this experience. UGA's housing department hired me, even though I didn't have the normal previous experience (again, fell into that, or maybe I talked my way in.). Living in an apartment in a high rise dorm with 1000 freshmen when I was 29 was...interesting, but I still enjoyed it. Did that for two years, and also worked in the VP for Student Affairs office for two years,while getting the ol' PhD. I also did my internship in London in between those two jobs and spent that summer backpacking around the UK and Ireland. Amazing. Totally amazing. If you haven't traveled overseas, do it right now! Go ahead, I'll wait. Cost is no excuse; you can do it for cheap. It's the single best investment, besides education, you can make in being a real grown up citizen of this world. You don't really know what it means to be an American until you're away from here -- ask any active duty military person who's served overseas. But I digress...

So I graduated in 2002 with my doctorate. I got a job with a branch of UGA and thought, "OK I'll do this for a couple of years until something better comes along." I became the Director of Student Affairs at UGA's Gwinnett Campus and moved to Lawrenceville, GA (near Atlanta). And then I met The One.

I had been whining to a friend about how I wasn't able to meet the right guy. Basically, getting a PhD is great for the mind but, for the dating, not so much. Those three letters after a woman's name are like anti-Viagra. My friend Lariel asked me what I was doing to put myself out there. I thought about it and said, "Uh, does whining to you count? No? Then, nothing." So, adventures ensued: speed dating, Lariel encouraging me to write my number on the credit card receipt at a restaurant where we had a cute waiter who turned out to be, like, 21 (I was 34), etc. Then my friend Shay talked about E-harmony and I got on it. Jerome was my first match. We were engaged after 9 weeks -- the commitment-phobe who used to say, "I want a man in my life, just not in my house" did this! -- and married within a year. We've been disgustingly happy ever since and we're coming up on five years together. I am a step-mom to Ethan and (biological) mom to Katie. I adore my family!

I needed this foundation of love because life had a lengthy period of challenge in store. Long, long story but my dad died, much family drama ensued, and Mom got sick with cancer and major orthopedic problems right after I got pregnant with Katie. Mom came to live with us in GA and we did our best to juggle new parenthood and her needs. My campus' existence was in jeopardy for a couple of years, so the job was stressful, too. There's a lot to be said about this time period but I'll save that for later. It was incredible and awful and sometimes both at the same time. After a long fight with many setbacks, my mom passed away in July 2008 and my brother passed away four months later, at the age of 49. If not for Jerome and the kids, I'd have gone insane.

So that's the update. Lots of stories are left out but that's the Cliffs Notes version. Oh, and yes, Jami and I are still friends. Living in two states keeps us from being "Jami and Teresa" except for the rare dinner but we're still buds. And don't believe any stories she has to tell about me.

So what's up with you?